yaoi-manga-reader-all-the-way:
NAGISA: Let’s say if each of us was a girl and we were to go out with someone in this group, who would you pick?
MAKOTO: Huh?
HARUKA: Why did the topic suddenly turn to that?
REI: I have absolutely no idea.
NAGISA: It’s a hypothetical question!
MAKOTO: Why did talking about lunches turn to talking about dating?
NAGISA: Because Rei-chan said [imitates REI] ‘A man who cooks is popular.’ So I was wondering, if we were girls, who would we pick?
REI: That wasn’t an imitation of me, was it?
NAGISA: I sounded just like you, didn’t I?
REI: No.
NAGISA: [imitates REI] No.
MAKOTO: Pfft!
NAGISA: I would pick… hmm… I wonder… Not Rei-chan. You seem to get too hung up by details.
REI: What are you saying, Nagisa-kun? You’ll find no partner more perfect than I am.
NAGISA: Eh? Really? But Rei-chan, you’ll definitely be a huge nagger. Always telling me not to spill things or to tuck my shirt in, and stuff.
REI: Me, a nagger? Listen. I have confidence in my memory, so I would never forget special days like birthdays. I can cook, and manage my time so I would never be late for a date. I would research beforehand the places we’d go, and even research the best path to take to the restaurant where I’ve already put in a reservation, so I would be the perfect escort for my date from start to finish. I would make a date enjoyable, leaving nothing to be desired.
MAKOTO: H-Haru… did you just think that Rei sounded like an infomercial?
HARUKA: How could you tell?
MAKOTO: [laughs] Because I thought so too.
NAGISA: Then, Rei-chan, who would you want to go out with among the guys here?
REI: Myself, of course.
[pause]
NAGISA: That’s… um… That’s very sad.
HARUKA: Really sad.
MAKOTO: Don’t say that. That’s who Rei is.
REI: Makoto-senpai… you’re not helping…
NAGISA: Then what about you, Mako-chan? Who would you go out with?
MAKOTO: Me? Well, let me see… hmm… I’ve been with Haru since we were kids, so I feel relaxed around him, and Nagisa is a cheerful person, so I have fun being around him, and Rei is upright, so I feel like I can expect him to take really good care of me… You all have your good points. Hmm… I can’t choose.
[All three sigh]
MAKOTO: Eh? Huh? What’s wrong, guys?
NAGISA: What do we call that kind of attitude again?
MAKOTO: Eh?
HARUKA: Wishy-washy.
MAKOTO: Ehh?!
REI: Makoto-senpai… You’re going to be in trouble one day…
MAKOTO: Wha– why?!
HARUKA: Being too nice brings the worst results.
MAKOTO: Not you too, Haru!
NAGISA: Then what about you, Haru-chan? Who would you choose?
HARUKA: …Makoto.
MAKOTO: Me?!
HARUKA: It just seems easiest.
REI: That’s your reason?
NAGISA: Ehh, you picked Mako-chan?
REI: Well, Makoto-senpai is kind and he seems likely to treat the person he dates with respect.
NAGISA: Hey, Haru-chan! If I was your boyfriend, I’ll cook mackerel for you for breakfast every morning!
HARUKA: I choose Nagisa.
MAKOTO: Ehhh?!
NAGISA: Yay!
REI: Haruka-senpai’s decisions all center around mackerel…
MAKOTO: I lost to mackerel…ITS THE REAL THING. FUCKING REAL….OFFICIAL. SAID BY OFFICIAL PEOPLE.
